Twas The Night Before Christmas - Trigun style!
by Teal Huskie
Summary: I got inspired to write this one day and it turned out very good! I am so proud of this and I die laughing everytime I read it. Rated PG for two swear words.. c.c;


A Trigun Parody to 'Twas The Night Before Christmas  
This was originally written by Kristi Leaders, AKA Teal Huskie AKA Fishie. No stealing phrases/etc. from this. It is for **reading** and **enjoyment** only! Do not copy, or post on your website without permission from me, the author!  
You can easily contact me by email [rufus@tealhuskie.com] or AIM [X Fishbone] or even MSN [bluesummers_@hotmail.com]  
Trigun is not legally mine [dangit. ;_______;] but I'm making an illegal claim of Vash The Stampede. n.n; Any objection? Bite me. XD 

  
'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the saloon,  
Not a drunkard was stirring, not even that big blonde buffoon.  
He was slouched over the bar without care,  
In hopes St. Nick-err, _Wolfwood_, soon would be there.  
Stun Gun Milly was nestled all snug in her bed,  
While visions of pudding cups danced in her head.  
And Meryl in a mad fit stormed out of the door,  
Intent on dragging back Vash The Stampede, and dropping him hard to the floor.  
  
When the doors to the bar broke down with a clatter,  
Our hero raised his head stiffly to see what was the matter.  
Away 'neath a table he dived, "I'm innocent!" he said,  
While a bottle, Meryl threw, shattered glass on his head.  
By the ear she had pulled him out to the streets,  
Accidentally, he squashed her foot with his cleats.  
At once she erupted, spouting fire like the devil,  
He screamed and he ducked when she swung a black shovel.  
The metal it hit and it clanged and it shook,  
The person it struck dazedly the shovel he took.  
  
More rapid than bullets the victim accused,  
"You there, young lady! That young man's abused!  
Now, Gungho's! now, Legato! now Midvalley, too!  
On, Zazie! On Chapel! on, Great Rubber Shoe!  
Arrest that vile lady and kick my bro's ass!  
He forgot I'm the sheriff and SHE stomped on the grass!"  
As dark shadow streaks 'fore the couple attacked,  
They pounded Vash senseless and the girl they had sacked.  
So back to their master they dashed and they flew,  
Carrying Meryl in a bag and dragging Vash with them, too.  
And then Knives' eyes twinkled at the other's misery,  
And he danced and he pranced and he giggled with glee.  
  
As Vash raised his head for the second time that night,  
His senses returned and he screamed out in fright.  
His brother was dressed in black, head-to-foot;  
A shiny gold badge on his chest, his coat dark as soot.  
The bundle of Meryl he had flung on his back,  
And he shot Vash a glare as he clobbered the pack.  
Green eyes - how the sparkled - shimmered with tears full of strife!  
The Stampede lunged at Knives' ankles and clung for dear life!  
His mouth grew quite wide as a loud wailing unsounded,  
And his chin, how it quivered, as his head to the dirt was impounded.  
Legato, he snickered, pointing out Vash's hair,  
Which now looked quite droll, poking up everywhere.  
  
A smile sneaked upon the evil one's face,  
"You are right, Legato, it looks quite out of place."  
With that he brushed some dirt from his shoulder,  
And reached and took Vash's gun from its holster.  
A wink of his eye was delayed from the time,  
As Vash jumped him whilst yelling, "Brother! That weapon is mine!"  
Never before had the others seen this side of the blonde,  
He fought single-handed and kicked four Gungho's in a pond.  
Then whirling around, he came faced with his brother,  
The blue-eyed one smirked and pointed his gun at the other.  
  
But his victory failed when Meryl kicked where it hurt,  
She'd torn through the sack; his weapon dropped to the dirt.  
Knives shrieked as he and his gang ran off from the fight,  
"That little hag knows how to kick! Its been one hell of a night!"  


How was it? Insane, I hope? n.n Epilogue (you mean you aren't even the slightest bit curious about what happened to everyone after this little ... incident? I'm very disappointed in you! ;_;) is coming up as the next chapter. n_x

Hope you liked it! I did! ^________^  
  
Till next time,  
Fishie


End file.
